Sunday, May 31, 2009

10 Ways to Make Yourself Feel Miserable

Okay, so this post may sound counter-intuitive but see if you're doing any of these things. You may discover that the reason you feel miserable is because you're doing one of these things. Knowing and identifying exactly what causes your misery is a giant step in removing that thing from your life.

10 Ways To Make Yourself (And Everyone Around You) Miserable
by Ali Hale

Have you been miserable lately? Got the hump, feeling down, worrying, stressing? Whatever’s got you down – swine flu, the credit crunch, the weather, a busy time at work -- you might as well milk it for all it’s worth. Here’s how to make yourself (and everyone around you) feel completely and utterly miserable.

(And don’t tell me you don’t want to be miserable. I’m pretty sure you’re already doing at least a few of the things on this list...)
  1. Turn Molehills Into Mountains
    When your printer jams, it’s not just annoying, it’s a disaster. When your car develops an odd rattle, it’s not just normal wear and tear, it’s clearly going to cost a fortune to fix. When your son swears at you, it’s not just a bit of acting out, it’s the first sign of junior delinquency.

    However small your problem, magnify it until it becomes overwhelming. You can only be properly miserable when you have huge problems.

  2. Dwell On It
    Now that you’ve got a big problem, make sure you dwell on it. Let it fill your waking thoughts. Let it spoil your time with your partner or family. (And make sure you keep bringing it up in conversation so everyone knows how awful you’re feeling.)

    Imagine all the worst-case scenarios that could result. Lie awake at night, dreaming up new ones.

  3. Worry About Things You Can’t Change
    Of course, problems that you can solve can only make you miserable for so long – eventually, you’ll either fix them or they’ll melt away of their own accord. So you need to worry about things that you have absolutely no control over.

    And you’re in luck: there’s a ready stock of these things on the daily news. Just switch on CNN, and start worrying...

  4. Let Everything Mount Up
    Whenever there’s something which might cause you stress – unanswered emails, unpaid bills, your taxes, your Christmas cards – let it mount up. Leave your bills unopened for months. Shove all your receipts straight into one big envelope. Don’t bother updating your address book until December 15th.

    This habit is self-reinforcing: the more the pile grows, the more reluctant you’ll be to tackle it. And guess what? The bigger it is, the more it’ll prey on your mind. An easy way to make yourself miserable.

  5. Blame Other People
    To be truly miserable, you mustn’t take responsibility for any of your problems. Blame your parents. Blame society. Blame the government. Blame your boss. Blame your big sister. To be honest, it doesn’t really matter who you blame. Just so long as you’re clear that you aren’t to blame at all – meaning you couldn’t possibly have any power to change the situation.

    Of course, to make sure that everyone else is just as miserable as you, be vocal, and tell people that it’s all their fault that your life is so screwed up.

  6. Beat Yourself Up
    Once you’re bored of blaming other people, start beating yourself up. Listen to that little voice in your head which says that you’re stupid and lazy. Let it go on and on until you believe it. Blame yourself for mistakes you made twenty years ago. Blame yourself for not being 100% perfect.

    This is a fast, easy and reliable way to become miserable and to stay miserable. If you do it well, you’ll be convinced that you have no power to change yourself.

  7. Complain, Whine And Grumble
    When you’re miserable, let the world know about it. Complain to your co-workers about the food in the staff canteen. Whine to your friends about your long hours, aching back and credit card debt. Grumble about the weather, the price of gas, the media, the government.

    If every word that comes out of your mouth is a negative one, you’ll be doing a great job of maintaining your miserable mood – and dragging down everyone else’s mood to match it.

  8. Never Accept Help
    Inevitably, your whining will cause someone to offer some help. Perhaps a friend at work says he’ll help you out with your paperwork, or your partner offers to do your tax return for you. Maybe your sister says she’ll look after the kids one Saturday to give you a break.

    Always insist that you don’t need help. Make yourself believe that the person offering couldn’t possibly lighten your burdens ... and make sure they know that they’ve stepped out of line by being willing to lend a hand. (They won’t offer again.)

  9. Follow The Path Of Least Resistance
    Whenever you have to make a decision, just follow the path of least resistance. It’s easier to stay in your current crap job than to hunt around for something better – so stay where you are. It’s easier to grab take-out rather than cook, so keep doing it (and make sure you feel thoroughly miserable about the effect on your wallet and your health).

    If you’re feeling demotivated, lethargic and dispirited, don’t fight it. Let yourself spend the whole weekend sitting around in your pyjamas, playing video games. Then beat yourself up (see number 6) for not getting anything useful done.

  10. Never Take A Break
    Sometimes, the path of least resistance doesn’t lead to duvet days and general apathy – it means carrying on with life at your current reckless rate. Keep working ridiculous hours; lack of sleep will contribute to your misery. Laugh at anyone who suggests a vacation – and tell them (or at least think to yourself) that they’re slackers for wanting a couple of weeks off.

    Make sure you’re burning the candle at both ends – and hating it. Go to bed miserable, and wake up miserable. What more could you want?

Thursday, May 28, 2009

Talking Points on Gay Marriage

As many of you who are members of our congregation know, the United Church of Christ was the first mainline Protestant denomination to affirm and support gay marriage. While many within our denomination understand the significance of this action, there are still many outside of it who are being confronted about this issue given recent political conversations about it.

Just turn on the television and watch CNN or Larry King and you'll hear folks saying that any support of gay marriage will lead our country to ruin, destroy traditional marriage, or lead to the legalization of pedophilia and bestiality.

Many of our members have friends and family members who do not support gay marriage because they respond to the fear tactics of those opposed to it. But fear not, gentle reader, here is a video with talking points that can aid you in responding to those who are either sincere in their desire to understand the gay marriage issue or who are ignorant and do not really understand that society will not collapse nor will traditional marriages destruct.

h/t Queerty

Wednesday, May 20, 2009

A Great Quote

"The most difficult thing is the decision to act, the rest is merely tenacity. The fears are paper tigers. You can do anything you decide to do. You can act to change and control your life; and the procedure, the process is its own reward."

--Amelia Earhart, who took off from Newfoundland on this date in 1932 on the world's first solo nonstop flight across the Atlantic Ocean by a female pilot.

Tuesday, May 12, 2009

Great Quote

I have been spending the day reading posts from my personal blog. I have been thinking it's time to turn it off, hang it up, and move on with that particular blog. It's been fun and I've enjoyed having it, but I just don't use it much anymore.

As I was reading through the posts, I came across the great quote: "Opportunity is missed by most because it is dressed in overalls and looks like work." -- Thomas Alva Edison

Isn't that the truth?!

Fish and Chips Dinner

You are invited to join us at the church this coming Saturday at 5:00 PM for our Fish and Chips dinner. Admission price is $15 and includes the fish and chips, refreshments, and a tasty dessert. You may eat in or take out.

Come hungry, leave happy...or something like that!

It'd be really cool if you could R.S.V.P. To do so, please call the church office or send me an email at See you there!

Lazy Postings

Can you believe it's been almost a month since I've posted anything on our blog? I must admit that the main reason is that I have become such a Facebook crony. I find myself there more often than even reading other blogs in my blog reader. But fear not, kind and faithful reader, more postings will resume on here.

Another reason that I haven't been posting much is that I have taken a sort of break from an online life of research and reading. While Facebook offered me a time to catch up with my friends, I took it as a break from having to write something. So, while I took a break I haven't quit it, I merely too a break a result, I spent more time with Jay and Maggie, went to bed at a decent time, and just goofed off at home instead of goofing off at home and online. In any event, my R&R has been good and now I feel rested enough to get back online and be the fab poster that I once was.

Look for regular postings in the days ahead.